A Rose By Any Other Name...

I did it. After five years of marriage, I added my husband's name onto the end of my own. So if you know my name, you realize that is a mouthful!

Why did I not change my name back in October 2004? Well, I was unsure about it, so I asked my (then) fiance what he thought. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Honey, do you think I should change my name?

Him: That's totally up to you.

Me: I know, but do you WANT me to change my name?

Him: It's up to you.

Me: I KNOW it's up to me... I am asking if you have a preference.

Him: I'm fine with whatever you want.

Me: (Changing direction) Do you think your dad wants me to take your family name?

Him: It's totally up to you.

Me: When we have children, do you want them to have your last name?

Him: (Brief pause) Yes.

Me: Okay, well, maybe I'll change my name then.

My name felt like such an important part of my identity. I had been known by this name for 32 years. My name was the very first gift my mother and father gave me.

Plus, it seemed like a hassle to change it, and Dave didn't really seem to care one way or another.

Lastly, I'd worked for the same company for almost 5 years and I felt that I had built a professional reputation on that name.

So... now that we have the V's, we will get to decide what happens to their names. They will keep their first names. Not just because I like those names, but because that is how they have been known for their whole lives. And that is the only gift they have from their birth mother. We will choose their middle names. And their last names will be my husband's name.

When it all came down to it, I just wanted to have the same name as the rest of my family. But I still couldn't give up the names my mother and father gave me, so I added his onto the end. It feels weird to say it. Tara L. Dave and Tara L. Tara D dS L. Dave, Tara, Valentino and Victoria L.

We're the L family. It feels good.