Adoption Day is Coming

Soon the V's will be mine.  Not just in my heart and my home and my life... but also in a court of law.  Tuesday, August 24th is the big day.  I have been telling Valentino that Adoption Day is coming, and here is what he knows about that day:

1.  "Go see a man" (the judge, who is, in fact, a man.)  He has graduated to this from saying "Go see a doctor."

2.  "Wear my adoption shirt."  I've been prepping him for the idea that he'll be getting dressed up for the big day, wearing an adorable shirt, vest, and tie (clip on, of course.)

3.  "Valentino stay with Mommy and Daddy forever and ever."  This, of course, being the most important part of all.

It's our intention that our children will grow up knowing they joined our family through adoption, that we love them every bit as much as we would have loved a biological child, and that adoption is an incredible gift that enabled us to become a family.

The other day, someone said to me, "Someday those kids will know how lucky they are to be adopted."  I know the comment was well-intentioned- at least, I think the meaning was that they are lucky to have such great parents.

But somehow that rubbed me the wrong way.  Why are they "lucky" to be adopted?  Don't they deserve to have a forever family just as much as anyone else?  Are they lucky because they were removed from an undesirable situation with the birth family?  Is someone lucky to be taken away from their birth family forever, even if that birth family was not doing a good job taking care of them?  Are they lucky because most people wouldn't have been willing to adopt "older" children?  Lucky because at least one family wanted them?

Here's what I think.

WE are the lucky ones.  Valentino and Victoria are my dreams come true.  They filled a huge hole in my heart and I am the luckiest person in the world to have been blessed with the gift of being their mommy.  I will never, never, never tell them they are lucky to have been adopted.  I will tell them that they were and are badly, desperately, wanted and loved, and that Adoption Day is cause for great celebration and rejoicing.    

I know there will be tougher, more complex conversations later on down the road, when their depth of understanding is greater- but for now, I am quite satisfied to tell my children that Adoption Day is about going to see a judge, wearing a special shirt, and Valentino and Victoria staying with Mommy and Daddy, forever and ever.